


If I Never Knew You

by thecomebackkids99



Series: Olicity Short Stories Series [9]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: 4x20, Engagement, F/M, Love, Speculation, olicity - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-02-03
Packaged: 2018-05-18 01:35:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5893036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecomebackkids99/pseuds/thecomebackkids99
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Laurel's death, Oliver and Felicity are left reeling. Their breakup was a month ago, and now, when they need each other the most, Felicity shuts Oliver out. The light that always encased Oliver is dimming.<br/>Oliver realizes that he has never thanked Felicity for saving him, and being his light. So he takes his motorcycle to the lair and sits down next to Felicity. And tells her how thankful he is for her constant support. And two more things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If I Never Knew You

*This is a spec fic after the death (I’m going to assume it’s Laurel) and Oliver and Felicity are not together after the secret is revealed.

 

Oliver sat on Felicity’s side of the bed, studying the pictures that they’d taken on their five months of bliss. How far away those days felt now. Felicity went to the lair a few hours ago, citing she wanted to track Darhk. He knew the drill by now; Felicity didn’t want to see him. Heaven forbid they were in the same room together. They barely made it through the funeral without sending fiery darts at each other.  She did. He just wanted― _needed_ ―to run up to her and hug her until all of the pain and fear washed away. But she barely looked at him. She rode in the limo, at least. But she never slid her hand in his. She never looked at him and said, “It will all be okay.”

He took his favorite picture from the shelf. The one from the Grand Canyon. Felicity had one arm spread wide. The other one came around his waist. Her smile radiated into him even now. Felicity. His light. The light that dimmed now. Last night she told him to kill the person who killed Laurel. Just two years ago she convinced him to not kill Slade.

She’d changed. He had too. Since then, he tried his best to be the others’ light. Thea’s. Laurel’s. At times. Dig’s. But never had he been Felicity’s. She was the one who encouraged him to be better. She was always so much better then him, and he never had to keep her from falling into darkness.

Had he ever told her that she was his light? He never remembered acknowledging it. She might not even know that she saved his heart―and his life―a thousand times.

Maybe, just maybe, if he told her, that dimmed light would shine again. Maybe he could help her this time.

Those words sunk deep into his being. He eyed the clock. Everyone would be at home. Except his…fiancée. He smiled. She would be his fiancée again. Soon she would be his wife.

He rode his motorcycle to the mayoral office. The lights were still on in his office; he could see Alex’s and Thea’s silhouettes. Not wanting to interrupt the cheering-up speech, he took the side door down to the bunker.

Felicity sat at the computers, typing so fast he could hear it even as he walked down the corridor. She spotted him, and stopped. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to see you.”

“I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

“I know you don’t. Which is why I’ll do the talking.” He grabbed his chair and sat down next to her. “I know you…hate me right now. You haven’t really given me a chance to say anything. So I’m going to do that now.”

“Fine, but I’m working on something right now.”

He could see Laurel’s profile picture from where he sat. “I know you said that I will never be able to apologize enough, but…I’m sorry. For not telling you about William, but also for never thanking you.”

“Thanking me for what?”

“For being my light.”

Her eyebrows crinkled together.

“Felicity, you were there when I murdered everyone in cold blood. When I did everything wrong. You were with us for a week, and you locked me out of my weapon’s closet. You made sure I knew that what I was doing was not the right way to do it.

“Then Tommy died. You and Dig found me on that island and brought me home. And you helped me continue. You bought me the bow…” he smiled as he remembered Felicity’s proud smile when he said it was perfect. “And you helped me become a better person. When my mom died, and I wanted to kill Slade, you forced me to find a different way to stop him.

“When Sara died, you were the one who called me out on my stubborn idea that I couldn’t mourn. You came to Nanda Parbat with me. You yelled at Ra’s for me. You….” He swallowed back a sob as Felicity’s chair turned toward him. She was listening. “You have made me a better person. You took my hand when I was living in darkness and pulled me into the light.

“What I want to say is that…you, Felicity, are the reason that I am the man I am today. If I had never walked into your office that day, I would still be a stone-cold killer. I might be dead. _You_ are the person who has always believed in me. No matter how awful I was. No matter how deep I had fallen. You have always been there for me.”

When he reached his hands towards her, she hesitated, but then her fingers encircled his. Tender, gentle…they were timid, but they were there. That was all that mattered.

“There are so many things I should have told you. About what happened during the five years. About William. And about the first time I met you.”

“You met me in the office.”

“That’s when I first talked to you. But I saw you…two years before that.”

Felicity’s eyes narrowed, but a tear slipped out.

“When I came back to Starling, I had to go on a mission. To Queen Consolidated. I saw you. You were your babbling self. I was hiding, but you were talking to the photo of me. You told me I was cute. And that it was too bad I was dead.”

“Oliver…”

“That was the first time I really smiled in…years. I smiled over a girl who just happened to walk into the office. I sure didn’t know you were the one back then, but I knew you were special.

“Felicity, I know you don’t trust me. I know that yesterday we buried a woman that we both loved dearly. We will never, ever heal from that. But we can move on. A few months ago you said that we could defeat Darhk together. We can’t beat him apart. I love you so much, and I want to fight right next to you for the rest of my life.”

When she smiled, he knew. She had become his again.

He slid off the chair to his knees on the floor. She gave a small giggle. “Felicity Smoak, will you take all of me―all of my darkness and all of my light―and become my wife?”

Felicity closed her eyes for a moment. Tears streamed down her face. And his. “Yes. I want you fighting next to me, Oliver Queen. I want you to be my husband. And I want to be your wife.

“And Oliver,” she leaned closer to him. “You’ve changed me too. You helped me become a better woman. A stronger one. One that will stand up to warriors and make them fear me. Most of them know that I could ruin their lives with my fingers, but that’s beside the point. The point is…if I never met you, I wouldn’t be sitting here, engaged to the love of my life for the second time. And I certainly wouldn’t be a vigilante. Overwatch. I would probably be stuck in Palmer Tech, working as an IT girl.”

He stood and pulled her up with him. “I love you, Felicity Smoak.”

Her legs still weak from the paralysis reversal, she leaned against him. “I love you too. Now let’s go home.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave your thoughts! :) I realized that Oliver has never fully acknowledged and thanked Felicity for being his light. And of course never told Felicity about how he first met her. (SQUEALS) Once they breakup, I want them together as quickly as possible (don't we all) and this is how I imagined it. I was listening to "If I Never Knew You" from Pocahontas, and I realized that this song is perfect for them.


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